So today at 7:15 in the morning I had my first electroshock therapy session. It went great and I remember everything even right before I fell asleep. I remember asking if I could keep my socks on because my feet were cold (hospitals are soo cold all the time) but that is the only part of me that moves during the treatment so they took them off and I was asleep and awoken soon after. I felt the strangest feeling ever after. It was like my brain had been woken up to new a level of experiencing sounds and colours. When I got home I took a gravol and tylenol and slept off my headache which went away about 3 hours later. And I was fine! I did a whole bunch of laundry, worried about my stupid dumb job (which I tried to quit but they told me to hang on cause 2 other people had just quit), laughed, ate subway and ice cream, talked on the phone etc. All the things I normally do. They part I wish I wasn’t was worrying about stuff. OH well.

A lot of people seem to be against the ECT or had bad experiences. I don’t the treatments are regulated around the world or even in north america. Although, I can imagine they are pretty standard in Canada as most of the docs I know do research and use the lowest possible current to make a difference. They even made me take a test before I had all the treatments to show there was no memory loss after. My doc gave me examples of his own patients who had it such as professors who could no longer study and found the haze was lifted after and other patients who couldn’t take the meds anymore. Meds are horrible things. I mean I know someone who got liver failure from all the drugs. They make you fat, constipated, low sex drive, tired, slow etc. They can work really well but it would be great to get some more less organ damaging and most likely cheaper (drugs costs are very high) treatments. I am a big fan of psychotherapy and if someone can afford it and only has mild depression do that instead!

I am mildly excited for my next one and to get the whole thing over with, be able to study and get a better job!!

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About depressionica

Young sciency/arsty/etc girl who is highly interested in her own problem, depression and mental illness. She takes the scientific approach and is constantly reading new research and self-help books.

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