I was pretty pissed off at first yes.

  I was lucky to be able to have access to free counseling at my university. For 3 years, I went to see a counselor at least once a week while I was taking classes. Last Novemberish my therapist officially gave up on me by saying that “sometimes you just go to help yourself” and not wanting to book another appointment because it wasn’t working. I think I was making some progress but I am a very intense and difficult case. Unlike when I was a lot less depressed, I don’t really feel that much better after I talk stuff out. The depressed feeling is still there, which leads me to believe my problem is mainly chemical.

I understand and get the point but I kinda went to the therapist to you know get help because I can’t help myself. I think I prefer my previous therapist’s strategy of yelling at me. Taking the nice approach never worked maybe it would have if I had been raised without yelling maybe? Ugh, I hate blaming stuff on my childhood though just because so many people had worse and they aren’t depressed or they had extremely awesome childhoods and now they are more depressed than me. 

I am lucky enough to be in Canada and have my psychiatric doctor and regular doctor visits paid for. However, because they are so busy I don’t get much counseling. Plus, I believe that they are also heavy believers in chemical basis for mental health problems, so they really don’t spend anytime counseling me besides maybe teaching me the odd meditation trick or getting me to talk about my past traumatic experiences. I think once they find out my past was not as traumatic as some other people’s and that my life is actually not in a depressing state, as in I am well-off, can go to school, good health besides mental health, they realize I am probably more of a chemically depressed patient. I only received free counseling through my school, which is when I am the most stressed anyways and other than that counseling sessions are about 100 dollars a pop. Personally, I don’t find them that effective. I have seen about 4 different counselors (Masters in counseling not a doctor) One I saw for 2 years, which I found helped a lot because she actually got angry with me. I think that is why she helped, it was a good way to get me to listen. If counseling was effective, I maybe would pay money for it but I kinda know what I need to change and if I actually want to do it I have to do it myself. I have read countless self help books and they point out some good things and different things than my counselor would but again it’s all about implementing the suggestions in the books.


About depressionica

Young sciency/arsty/etc girl who is highly interested in her own problem, depression and mental illness. She takes the scientific approach and is constantly reading new research and self-help books.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s